


Bittersweet Memories

by arch_cape522



Series: Flufftober 2020 [4]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec Lightwood Deserves Nice Things, Bad Parent Maryse Lightwood, Childhood Memories, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Flufftober, Flufftober 2020, Forgiveness, Good Parent Maryse Lightwood, Happy Ending, Light Angst, M/M, Tags Are Hard, she's trying
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 06:39:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26847547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arch_cape522/pseuds/arch_cape522
Summary: Alec sits in the attic of his childhood home looking back at memories.
Relationships: Alec Lightwood & Maryse Lightwood, background Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood - Relationship
Series: Flufftober 2020 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1954840
Comments: 4
Kudos: 35





	Bittersweet Memories

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt #4: Childhood 
> 
> ***TW*** Alec mentions a bit about his feelings when he came out to Maryse in this fic. It does not go into depth about what he felt but it does touch upon it. I just want to let people know just in case it could be triggering to some. There are some sad moments but there are some happy/fluffier moments as well.

Alec was sitting in the attic of his childhood home, going through boxes full of memories and things that his Mom collected over the years. There were old photo albums, his first book bag when he started kindergarten, and his trophy from an archery competition, amongst other things. He didn’t realize that his mother kept all these things. Picking up the photo album, Alec started to flip through the pictures and stop at one of him, Jace, and Izzy and smiled. 

“That one was when Jace decided to cut your sister’s hair,” Maryse said, holding two cups of coffees. 

Alec jumped, not expecting to see his mom stand behind him with coffee. “I remember that,” Alec said as he grabbed one of the coffee cups out of his mom’s hands. “We got in so much trouble that day. Izzy cried for hours.” Alec laughed. 

Maryse sat down next to Alec. “It wasn’t funny when it happened,” she responded, smiling at the picture. “You were always taking the blame for Jace thinking that we didn’t know he was the one who committed most of those incidents.” 

“I don’t know what you're talking about,” Alec smirked, pretending he was oblivious to what his mom was saying.

Maryse laughed. “Still want to be in denial, I see.” 

“I plead the fifth,” Alec smiled and flipped the page of the photo album. 

They both sat in silence, for the most part, commenting here and there about specific pictures. It was nice to have this moment, Maryse, being able to reminisce about his childhood. His relationship with his mother wasn't healthy for a while, so he’s happy that he could sit with his mom looking at old photos. 

Putting down the photo album, Alec went to pick up another. Opening it, he saw a picture of him and Magnus before they started dating almost 15 years ago. Alec slowly moved his finger along the photo, surprised that his mom even had this photo. So many emotions were rushing through him; anger, sadness, happiness, confusion, and things he hasn’t felt in a long time. 

Maryse, watching Alec closely, knew what Alec was thinking. She remembered that night, always sitting on the back of her mind and one of the moments she wished she could undo. Alec had just won first place in the national archery competition, and it was the night he also chose to come out. She remembers the mean words she said to Alec and how she blamed Magnus for influencing him. 

“You were so disappointed in me that night,” Alec said, breaking the silence. The sound of his voice was betraying the hurt and confusion he still held on to for all these years. “I did everything to make you proud. I was willing to let Magnus go…”

Maryse kept quiet, trying to gather her thoughts. She knows she messed up. She knows it would take more than a few years to make up for what she did. 

“Sweetie,” Maryse sighed as she grabbed the photo album out of his hands, placing it to the side. “I can’t change what happened, and I am so sorry that I made you feel unloved and unwanted. That is on me and me alone. I was the one who refused to talk to you and understand you. You did nothing wrong. You wanted to support that night, and I should have been there to give it to you.”

Alec listened to what his mom was saying, listening to each word separately. He knew his mom was sorry. She said it many times, but that pain, hurt, confusion still lingers in his mind. “It’s been over 15 years since that night, and I’m still holding on to it.” 

“Alec,” Maryse spoke quietly, “There is no time limit on when you forget things or let things go. Some things stay with us and harder to let go. You have every right to be still upset. I hurt you. I am your mother, and I said horrible things to you and Magnus. You have every right to feel the way you feel. Just because I am trying, it doesn’t erase the damage done.”

“I know.” Alec looked up at his mom and gave her a small smile. He didn’t want to talk more about that day. Alec had this conversation with his mom many times throughout the years. He knows his mom is trying, and he appreciates it. Although that event happened 15 years ago, it wasn't until the last several years where they started to get closer and talk more, happy with the effort that his mom was making with him and Magnus. 

Maryse gave a smile back. Of course, she knew she still had to work on their relationship, but she will do that at Alec’s pace. “I never told you,” Maryse began to say with a more happy tone, “I’m glad you have someone like Magnus by your side. I never told you that but watching you these last few years made me realize how much you both love one another, and it’s really all I wanted for you.”

“He makes me happy,” Alec smiled, twisting his wedding band on his finger. “Speaking of Magnus, he should be arriving soon with Izzy and Jace. We should bring a few boxes downstairs and tell embarrassing stories about each other.”

“Like the time you, Izzy, and Jace decided to make a cake, but it exploded in the oven,” Maryse laughed. “Or how about the time Jace threw a baseball at the car and shattered the window? Which one should we talk about?” Maryse chuckled as she got up from her spot.

“Remember the time Jace tried to dye his hair, and it turned orange” Alec laughed quietly at the memory while listening to his mom rant about how the dye stained her white tiles and counters in the bathroom. He followed his mom down the stairs as she continued to rant, holding tight a box of memories, and just smiled. 

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, lovelies! I hope you all enjoy this. This one was a bit hard to write for me since I drew a lot from what I experienced years ago. I never really had a "coming out" in the sense that I didn't tell people personally that I identified as LGBTQ+. I just talked about who I liked/was attracted to and was very opened about it. My parents were supportive, although I had to explain to my dad about some things, otherwise, he was supportive. I did, however, have some very judgmental family members, who made hurtful and rude comments about me, liking whoever, and that is where I drew the emotions from.


End file.
